A Big Scare...

It's been awhile since we've been able to get in an update.  But one is definitely needed now.  We went for a visit and my dad's quarterly assessment on Wednesday.  He wasn't quite himself.  Very hard to re-direct.  And even though he was so happy to see us and wanted to "kick our butts" in pool, we never actually played.  He sat at his table and kept telling us he was going to get up and take his shot.  But he never actually did.  He was off, and slower, and he had a bad cough.  I thought maybe he was coming down with something and just wasn't feeling well.  We took him back and went to his meeting. 

Not much new to report, just the overall general decline.  But he's still pretty active and conversational with the staff and other residents.  He's big into counting things, he likes looking out the window and counting the cars in the parking lot.  Or commenting and reading aloud everything he sees.  There will be some normal conversation mixed in.  He'll talk about the past like it was yesterday.  We even pulled up a photo of his house when he was a boy on google maps, and he told us all about it, including the address.  Then he want back to commenting on the "medium sized yellow flag" on the wall (not only does he read things, he'll tell you the shape and size too!).

We left a little worried about him being off, but hoped he'd perk up the next visit.  What happened the next day was completely unexpected, and I know it's something we'll never forget.  I got a call at work on Thursday saying my dad had a fall.  I remember thinking that's weird.  Dad is very stable and it's unlike him to be unsteady on his feet.  He's one that actually helps out with the other residents because he is strong and able.  Never having received a call like this in the past, I figured it was just part of their procedure and they were required to report this to me some time after the fact.  I assumed it had happened earlier in the day and they were getting around to the phone call now.  But then she said they were sending him to the ER, and the more she talked I realized he was still on the ground.  And he was not conscious.  I was trying to get a sense of should we take off work and rush there now?  I even remember asking her "I'm over an hour away, what should I do?" I felt like I was trying to think in slow motion.  I was caught off guard, and I couldn't form a coherent question to get the information I needed to know.  The last thing she said before hanging up was "I can't tell you what to do, but it looks pretty bad." 

I called my sister who was even further away than I was and we decided we would meet up and head there together.  In the meantime, the nurse called back and said they had gotten him in the ambulance and he had regained consciousness and was starting to respond.  We at least got to spend the drive feeling a little better about his condition.  I couldn't help worrying what this fall would do to his brain.  Would he be worse, much much faster?  Would he turn mean again?

When we got to the ER and took one look at him, it was heart-wrenching.  He looked like he got beat up.  His eye was purple and swollen shut.  There were cuts on his face and one side of his face was so swollen, his face was completely misshapen.  He was lying on his bed in a quiet room by himself.  Drumming his fingers on his (oversized!) stomach to some kind of made up beat.  I knew immediately it was a self-soothing mechanism and he was keeping himself calm.  He really didn't stop the entire time we were there.  But he did seem more at ease once he saw us and we put the T.V. on for him.  He thanked us for coming, and said he was glad we could come out (same as he would say when we come in for a visit).  And anytime we talked to a staff member and asked a question he would thank us for being there and thank us for asking.  It felt like he was a child, and he really didn't understand what was going on. The CAT Scan came back normal, but he had an orbital blow out fracture under his eye, and the sinus cavity was filled with blood.  They said to make sure he didn't blow his nose or anything, which would be hard because he still seemed to be coming down with something and he had a horrible cough. Within 4 hours he was being sent back to the nursing home.

We met him back at the nursing home and when we saw some of the nurses come up to us, it really hit me how serious this was.  They were really shaken.  One nurse said she didn't think he'd be back.  When she heard the fall from a distance, and then saw what happened, she thought he was gone.  She said he was walking out of the dining room with his magazines and then he had a bad coughing spell.  He lost his balance, fell and crushed his face into the wall, and then hit the ground.  From a distance she said it sounded like someone threw a coconut against the wall. And then he was unconscious. 

Once we saw he was settled in a recliner and had eaten some lunch, we headed home.  He seemed more confused than usual, but he had been through a lot and he needed rest.  We left feeling very thankful, considering how things could have turned out.  We're also thankful that the staff is just as concerned about him as we are.

But then Thursday evening around 10:00 I got a call that my dad now had a temperature of 102 and it wasn't responding to meds.  They wanted my consent to send him back to the ER.  Of course I agreed, and then I had to wait.  All I could think was they must have missed something, and some infection was spreading now.  I called the ER and left a message for them to call with an update as soon as they could.  They called back at 12:30 and said he has pneumonia.  They were running several courses of IV antibiotics and they would be sending him back in a couple hours when they were done.  I could picture him, how tired and exhausted he must be by this point, and how he'd be dragged back in the middle of the night.  I asked how he was, if he seemed anxious about being there.  She said no, actually he's just drumming his fingers on his belly and he seems very calm.  Again made me think of him as a small child being alone, and I felt terrible we couldn't be there.

Over the past couple days he seems to be doing much better.  No more fever, the cough is getting better, and his face looks much better.  Still very black and blue, but the swelling is much better.  He has a face shape again.  I saw him yesterday and I should be relieved at how well he looks considering everything he's been through.  But I can't help but think how this is going to escalate things?  He is much more subdued, and seems more confused than I've seen.  He's been on a lot of different medications, he is sick, and had a horrible trauma to the face/head.  So it is understandable.  I just hope he can bounce back a little from this.