Friday, June 20, 2014

Update on our concerns after 5/21 visit...


After our last visit and discussion with the nurse on dad’s changing behaviors, I wanted to address our concerns with the social worker.  I sent her an email explaining what we had heard and how we were upset that maybe this was a sign that things were changing.  He had been so friendly and agreeable since we discovered him in this state last summer, and we wanted to hang on to this phase as long as possible.  I had also heard earlier that week that they upped his Vitamin D after he tested low, so I wondered if that could have any impact on his behavior.
She explained that after talking to the staff, they had noticed some increased agitation gradually over the past several weeks.  And that it was worse over that weekend into Monday.  There were a couple incidents with other patients where he thinks he is “helping”, like wanting to push them somewhere in their wheelchair and the other patient doesn’t like it.  But he doesn’t stop.  And he hasn’t been as easy to redirect as he was in the past.  It sounds like things escalated a little and there were raised voices involved on both sides.   There was another incident over a puzzle.  He wanted to help another resident work on a 25 piece puzzle of the United States.  Sometimes this is ok, and other times the resident just wants to work alone.  This was one of those times, but my dad wasn’t getting the message.  It sounded like it turned into an argument.  I can’t help but think how this sounds like an incident that would occur in a preschool classroom. 

She put our concern about the Vitamin D on the doctor’s board.  But it sounds like these were gradual changes that occurred before they started him on it.  She said the staff talked about it and now they understand that they would need to take more time to redirect him.  Whereas before it was a quick “Hey, let’s do this instead” was all it took, now they might have to try a different approach to keep things from escalating.  It also sounds like it may be on the lines of what we saw at the end of our last visit.  He was on a mission, and nothing was redirecting him or sinking in.  He wasn't unpleasant about it, he wasn't trying to be difficult, but the connection just wasn't being made.
She thinks it may be a sign of a decline.  It’s just so wrong.  I try not to let the severity of this impact me too much on a day to day basis.  I am happy he is in a safe place that he seems to like, he is being fed real meals every day, his health is being monitored, and they generally seem to care about him.  But other times it really hits home that my 64 year old father is in a nursing home.  He’s completely mobile, but he’s in a nursing home.  In a locked unit.  For his own good.  He would have hated this if he was in his right mind.  Brilliant mind that he once was...

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