We saw in the VA newsletter that they were having a 1 mile-ish (actually, a 2K)
walk on 5/21. We thought this might be a
nice way to get dad outside and enjoy some of the nice grounds of the facility, so we decided to go for a visit. When we got there we realized it might be tough to get dad to change his routine and spend part of
the day outside, rather than shooting pool during our visit. He really seemed to have no interest in getting outside and leaving the pool table. We decided we just needed to be firm and tell
him this is what we were doing. He
agreed, so we walked over.
The facility
is so large, it was practically a mile to walk over to the pavilion outside
where they had sub sandwiches and some food and music playing for the
walkers. He was dressed in sweats,
which was way too warm for the weather.
I was sweating just watching him, but the temperature never seems to
bother him. Once we got to the pavilion
we decided to just sit and eat rather than doing the walk. He had already walked far enough, and we didn’t
want to push him too much. So we got our
food and sat at a table and enjoyed the music and sunshine. It felt like a normal spring day at the park
with normal conversation. He often
commented on the different songs, whether he liked them or not, how old they
were and who sang them. It sometimes
surprises me how his memory has held up for certain things.
After we ate, we started on the long walk outside again to shoot
one more game of pool before we left. He
started saying he needed to use the bathroom.
Which he always does because he drinks 9 cups of coffee and 3 cans of
pop and bottles of water and whatever else he can find because he seems to have
no sense of fullness when it comes to food and drinks. He started making grunting noises as he was
walking which was a little unsettling. My sister and I looked at each other like, are
we pushing him too much? Is he too
hot? Is he going to the bathroom right
now? We picked up the pace to get him to
a bathroom faster, but he kept saying he would be ok. He didn't seem anxious about it at all. But we sure were. We made it back and all was fine.
Since this was a weekday, I needed to be back early to get
the kids off the bus after school. I was paying
careful attention to the time, and when a game wrapped up around the time we
needed to leave, I told dad we needed to get going to get the kids. He said ok.
But then proceeded to break the balls and start a new game. I tried again, “dad, we really need to leave
because the kids are going to get home and no one is there to get them off the
bus. We don’t have time to play a new game.”
He said “oh, ok” but continued to play.
He was pleasant and it didn’t seem like he was trying to be
difficult. I think he was just confused
and it just wasn’t getting through to him.
I worried maybe we had pushed him too far off his routine, especially with
the heat and the long walk. So I let it
go, let him finish the game and prayed it would be a fast one. Then we rushed him back to his room. He seemed more confused than usual and kept
forgetting we had just eaten, asking when we were going to lunch and saying we
could stop at the cafeteria on the way.
He’s done this before, but this was worse and took a lot more reminding
and redirecting than usual.
As we were leaving, one of the nurses made a couple comments
to us about some unusual behavior he had been having the past few
days. She mentioned he had seemed more
agitated and had been acting out a little with a couple of the other residents,
which was very unlike him. It was
unsettling and I had a ton of questions, but we didn’t have time to discuss it much or ask what she
meant. It was kind of a downer after a visit
that started out so nice. There were
times being outside on the nice grounds of the facility, where it was easy to forget
he is sick. We left that day realizing it
would be unlikely that we would be able to take him offsite for some little day
trips this summer like we were hoping to do.
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